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Class 15 winter 2016

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on April 12, 2016 at 12:09:49 pm
 

 

Collect Make Up Responses

 

Follow up: Ballots from Product Evaluation Projects

 

Discuss readings: Evaluating Documentaries

 

Collect Film Evaluation Worksheet (after Discussion)

 

Introduce Essay III 

Introductory Material for Film

 

 

  1. Read/Review Essay III page
  2. Read/Review  Introduction to Craigslist Joe page to prepare for film screening
  3. Complete Pre-viewing section of Film Analysis Worksheet(Response 3) and read through questions prior to the film screening

 


 

Jodi's Presentation


Product Evaluation Product Project: Contest and Thesis Statements

 

The results are in.

 

Best Product Evaluation Project Winner....

 

 

 

 

 

 

Congrats to Taylor and Kyra

 

Why you voted for Taylor and Kyra:

strong appeal to pathos

good support for criteria/ethos

a lot of information

 

 

Your Thesis Statements/Ballots

What are we looking for in a strong thesis statement?

Criteria for Evaluation:

  • direct statement of value
  • clear, specific, and applicable criteria
  • solid sentence that is well-written, parallel, and mechanically sound

 

Provided Sample:

Molly Milton's product evaluation of La Croix Sparkling Water was the most convincing project because she appealed to pathos by creatively presting a need for the product, she enthusiastically described the benefits of purchasing and drinking La Croix by comparing it to other popular sparkling water brands, and she designed her handout in an easy-to follow and appealing fashion. 

 

(notice it's one sentence, lists criteria in parallel format, and it is written in 3rd person)

 

 

 

 

 

Finally, the winning thesis statement...


 

 

 

 

 

 

Congrats to Shue!

 

Dadrion James product evaluation of Quizlet App is the most convincing product evaluation because she made her thesis clear and well organized, she appealed to ethos by telling us her own experience using Quizlet how it helped her in some of her college classes, and insteaqd of telling us how to use Quizlet, she showed us by supporting it with pictures and explain how it worked. 

 

 

I think that Rick has the best Evaluation project because he uses ethos, showing us that he has used both the playstation 4 and Xbox one before, he describes each of his criteria to show why the Xbox one is a must have, and he lets us know important details such as price and features within his product.

 

 

-identifies 3 applicable criteria and specifies something about each of those criteria

-solid ideas

 

A few revisions:

"I think"

capitalization

vary word choice

combining ideas/clarity in list

 

Easy fix to strengthen this thesis:

 

Rick has the best evaluation project because he appeals to ethos by discussing both the Xbox One and its competitor the PlayStation 4, he describes each of his criteria to support why the Xbox One is a must have, and he offers a thorough overview of all of the product's details such as its price and its many features. 

 

Parallelism Review

 

Image result for parallelism in sentences

 

Parallelism means that similar ideas in a sentence are expressed in similar grammatical form. It means balancing words with words, phrases with phrases, and clauses with clauses. Use parallelism to make your sentences flow smoothly and your thoughts easy to follow.

 

In each of the following pairs of sentences, notice which sentence is easier to read:

 

The horse was large, had a bony frame, and it was friendly.

The horse was large, bony, and friendly.

 

Maria enjoys swimming and drag races cars.

Maria enjoys swimming and drag racing.

 

 

 

The second sentence in each pair is balanced grammatically. Large, bony, and friendly are all adjectives.Swimming and drag racing are both nouns ending in -ing. This parallelism makes the second sentence in each pair sound better than the first.

 

How to find errors

 

Nouns in a series should be parallel.

 

A thesis statement that is clear, strong supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion that should be interesting are all elements of a well-written essay.

(The nouns statement, paragraphs, and conclusion are not parallel in this sentence because the modifiersused to describe them are not grammatically balanced.)

How can we revise this sentence to make it parallel?

 

Adjectives in a series should be parallel.

 

The concertgoers were rowdy and making a great deal of noise.

(The noun concertgoers is modified in this sentence with one adjective, rowdy, and one adjective phrase,making a great deal of noise.)

Revision?

 

Verbs in a series should be parallel.

 

The sports fans jumped and were applauding.

(The verbs jumped and were applauding are in different tenses.)

Revision?

 

 

Phrases and clauses within a sentence should be parallel.

The parents who supervised the new playground were pleased about the preschoolers playing together and that everyone enjoyed the sandbox.

(About the preschoolers’ playing together and that everyone enjoyed the sandbox are not parallel; the first is a phrase and the second is a clause.)

 

Items being compared should be parallel.

 

It is usually better to study for an exam over a period of time than cramming the night before.

(The words better…than show that two items are being compared. The forms to study and cramming are not parallel.)

 

 

 

How to correct errors

  1. If nouns in a series are not parallel, rewrite the sentence so that the nouns in the series are grammatically balanced.

    Aclearthesis statement that is clear, strong supporting paragraphs, and an interestinga conclusion that should be interesting are all elements of a well-written essay.

  2. If adjectives in a series are not parallel, change the sentence as needed so that all themodifiers are the same type.

    The concertgoers were rowdy andnoisy.making a great deal of noise.

  3. If verbs in a series are not parallel, make sure that all of them are in the same tense.

    The sports fans jumped and applauded were applauding.

  4. If phrases and clauses within a sentence are not parallel, rewrite the sentence using grammatically balanced phrases or clauses.

    The parents who supervised the new playground were pleased that about the preschoolers playingplayedtogether and that everyone enjoyed the sandbox.

  5. If items being compared are not parallel, rewrite the sentence to make them parallel.

    It is usually better to study for an exam over a period of time thanto cramcramming the night before.

 

 

Discussion: Evaluating Documentary Films

 

Gary Garrison's Review of I am Chris Farley

Brian Tallerico's Review of Montage of Heck

 

Both of these articles are evaluating the same genre of film:

documentary film is a nonfictional motion picture intended to document some aspect of reality, primarily for the purposes of instruction or maintaining a historical record.[1]

 

Subgenre:

What kind of documentary films do they evaluate?

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

Based on these two reviews, what types of criteria do we use to evaluate documentaries (or even more specifically, biographical documentaries about celebrities)?

In other words, what do reviewers look for in a good documentary?

 

What do reviewers look for in a good biographical documentary?

 

 

Gary Garrison's Review of I am Chris Farley

 

What value does he assign?

What is his thesis?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Clue words for critical evaluation

2 parts: what it attempts to do and what actually happens

 

Structure:

Paragraphs 2-4 (purpose)

Paragraph 5

Paragraph 6: further development of thesis/what do we expect in a biographical documentary?

Paragraph 7: Technical Level (what is the claim here?)

Paragraph 8 (conclusion)

 

 

In Brian Tallerico's Review of Montage of Heckwe see a different approach and a different evaluation argument.

 

Introduction: Why does Tallerico use narration?  How is it related to his overall purpose?

Thesis:

 

Paragraph 3

Tool: Classification

Typically documentaries about music icons take one of two approaches

 

Criteria

Paragraph 4: arrangement

Paragraph 5: content

 

Conclusion

Paragraph 6

     critical angle


 

Discuss Essay III

 

Preparation for film screening:

Introduction to Craigslist Joe 

 

 

 

  1. Read/Review Essay III page
  2. Read/Review  Introduction to Craigslist Joe page to prepare for film screening
  3. Complete Pre-viewing section of Film Analysis Worksheet(Response 3) and read through questions prior to the film screening

 

 

 

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